<+eAchErs Day cEleBraTion >

heYy...todae is soo different. haha ok..crap` ..yea half-day worh but mAnI tings happen den those normal boring full day.

Firstly in the morning... took tt 4 yummy^ tub of ice-cream to sch =p. den meet yp at e bustop...duh i tink both of us 'waste' alot of sms during tt. hahahax...but afta tt still hav to wait 4 pai so it was kinda fun for me..waiting for them instead of being stuck in claz. ok after tt,..went for the cca award assemble...its kinda err..stupid la [ like wad ng tink] 1 person take can alreadi wad..Y muz ev.body stand thr..lol he sae until we vehh extra like tt. bUt aniwae its kinda fun bahh..hahahax we turn our heads to da side to sing national anthem. lol...den the lame basketballers was singing so loud.
aFta tt is the aces day.... tink its erm..not v.successful cos ev.body was dressed up..who wan to jump here jump thr? hahahax...
Ok afta tt (i noe i said alot of timess)...is e breakfast. Took many photos with jiemin dey all..hahax tt digital camera of hers... N den jovita sent me e photos juz now. its nice..i like it. i hope i could upload my photos soon.....

tHe concert har..n0t bad la. 2/3 performance v.lame...bUt 5/1 rockks! its sooo funie...hahahax i couldn't stop laughing. Cherie de claz...u noe wad? i tink their claz is really tt dramatic in real life. . dey're v.close n v.fun. Dun tink thr is ani claz as "gd" as theirs...haha [ c i prasie u all worh].

when sch ends...at first me n flo tot tt our sch alreadi close le...so we decided to follow jovi, shirley n ruiqi to their sch..red swastika. haha..tink ruiqi was quite surprise to c me thr...hm aniwae tink their sch not bad la...N guess wad? dey say the pledge in chinese! i was like..huh? got sch sae pledge in chinese wan meh? lol...
aNiwae..in the end we still go back to sch la. See alot of ppl even if its 2pm. Cool rite..u seldom c so mani x-gonshangers gather together..den ev.body was playing wif their frens. of coz we met our x-clazmates...hmm sum change sum nvr. typical la..den we had some catching up wif our teacher... its nice. N my sch change alot...got gym n museum...n piano at the foyer. jUz now when i was thr..i had a wishful tinking tt if only i still study in this sch..haixx .
i feel tt thr is juz too mani tings....too mani tt cud take place in ur life...N many changes. bUt i guess...having the chance to look back once in a while is gd enuf....
btw..changed my blog skin le =p nice ma? hahaharx..

---* hAnG On *---

WhIte- dR3@m

* Phew* I thot i couldn't blog todae..with this stupid textbox not working..haizz
Okayy..i'm kinda hungry now but i dun even noe if my mom cook alreadi not.

Back to yesterdae...Well its kinda lAmE sia. Went to sch for 1hr juz for a " rehersal" =X . aNd its shoooooo` hot lor. tia0..but aniwae it giv me da opportunity to ask my seniors abt e sub comb. well...as i had expected, aLL ask me to take elect geog =( . hAix..not tt i dun like it but i tink i'm really not cut out for geog. I see da qns..i see the textbk i alreadi damn sianz liao. but wait a min..social studies is alreadi history..sO it doesn't make sense to take anoda hist rite?

ACTually..i tink i alreadi kn0w wad i really want..jUz tt i dun dare to make tt decision.
I want lit.

To others its kinda out' of' e' mind..but to me.. i may hav some interests in it. oH well... DEFinitely more den geog. i can assure of tt. bUt for long terms sake...i dun tink tt it is a very smart decision. tHe O's paper came frm London, eNgland. if i realy take lit...it wld be double the hard for me...their standard of literature wld be damn high...n hrd frm ppl tt our sch's lit standard aren't gd? hAixXx....

i'm Blank Out. i really dunoe wad to choose............. aFta tinking for dunoe how mani days. N tmr hav to hand in the options le.

But for the time being...i gUEss => Not Thinking of Anything <= wld be da best of all. aNd its da secret to happiness... .:: >> iT mAy sEeM beAutIfuL n0w ... bUt nvr bE tRicKed iNtO thIs wHirL oF eMotIoNs.<< ::.

Haizz..these few days...i feel so lazy. i'm so lazy tt i dun even bother to edit my skin. lol.. guess i nid motivation..
Actually, got alot to update de, but juz duno wad to type.. this wk not bad la. Only got science test..n0t tt stressful. aNiwae, lucky dun hav biji todae..or else do until die manz. but nxt thurs got hcl test n fri still hav ta stay back for stoopid geog. iMagine, afta a boring sci lesson which cud probably made me fall asleep, stil hav ta stay back to c Suriadi...dotzz` haiz...speaking of geog. I really duno wad sub comb to take...aRrgGhh. This is killing me lor..i'm neva gd at making choices...N not guarateeing myself to not regret. i hate to regret...i dun wan to. aLL i wan to --- is to be with my frens. =) but is tt possible? i dun wan to go 2 a claz wif so mani unfamilliar faces.. n i dun tink i noe wad i want.yet.
tOdae quite fun bahh...went to sunplaza park afta tt wif jovi flo n jew. We sWinGgg~~~ sWinGgg~~ sWinGgg-- soo fun. den also got chat alot. hmm...tok abt religion i guess. + Christianity n Buddhism+ cOnverTing n nOt. i guess everybody had their own beliefs..i wun touch on tt tho. but i juz feel so sad when i c a family not united with their beliefs. i dun tink i cud accept if 1 of family members convert to christian. perhaps i'm still young...n hvn understand but i juz couldn't imagine it. eXpecially when ur parents die n yet u couldn't pray to them. isn't this sad? i duno y..but i felt quite strongly to this things tho.
hmM...it was a nice day i guess. Seldom we got da chance to chit-chat so mani meaningful things...N till now to mOn i'm gonna asked all my seniors on the sub comb tingy. i'm realli lost.
tIll da nxt. gdnitez.

Hii..i'm finally back (frm whr?) hahah..ok i will stop crappin and update my post.
aniwae..these few days arh ~~ still the same lo. wad can u xpcect? haaha. but i've come to realise tt simplicity isn't bad too..cAn learn to appreciate the small yet significant things in our lives. Like..Friends =) Even tho i dun hav a wide circle of aquaintances, i still hav a few no. of gd frens which i tink is enuough to make ur day. So what if u hav a wide circle of aquaintances? they are juz merely ppl whom u are aquainted wit..and nth beyond friendly greetings whereas real friends are those who standby u...chat wif u..hangout with. tHo ur frens might not always make u happi, n when ya have fights..dey are the ppl who wld eventually help u when u needed it.Cheer you up when u are sad. and make a smile when u tot u wld nvr smile again......

Hahaha..am i right on my little essay of frenship? ;) duno wad inspire me to..juz hav da inspiration to write sth on it since i've lived in this planet for 14 yrs & hav encountered mani mani diff.type of friendships. bliv me. But if it had ever make me wiser..i dunoe. I believe in giving everybody the benefits of doubts N i noe tt thr is nObody who is exactly Black or White. Jus shades of grey. I dunoe if i had make a smarter decision but i noe i would be easily hurt this way. 'cos of tt i owas guard myself wheneva i met new ppl..n nvr let ppl c me through easily. I guess i looked rather secretive & perhaps proud -- tt's wad ppl always tell me. hmm..yea i tink i'm easily misunderstood by ppl. never mind tho...cos i'm actually da opposite if u noe me v.well. hahahax...but thr's still one guard tt i've neva let down. Trust. i dun trust ppl easily..n i tink i could neva do tt. even if u are my best friend. i dunoe y..but i guess i'm juz like tt. Will i change? well...maybe

#.Back to Reality.#
e highlights of todae is definitely li jia wei who is playin the semi-final game. i reali reali hopes she wins...cos being a "sport person" [lol] myself, i noe the AGONY of intensive training n how 1..juz ONE competition cud bring u down. But aniwae, i dun bliv in competitions, exams n tests or ani other stupid form of testing cos a performance, competition or exam cAnt measure n decide uR abilities. This is juz not fair...wonder wich stupid idi*t invented these...but yea competitions could inspire ppl to go forward...
i guess this is all so long now...buhbye.

*lost iNside* .:: tHe [feEling] sHe [HiDes]. tHe [dR3@m] sHe cAn't [fiNd]. She's [LoSing] hEr [mind]. sHe's [fallen] frm [GraCe]. sHe's aLL oVer e plAce... .::

Sigh. wad a day it is...

Firstly, i've been practicing like crazie since last nite. at least got 2 hrs i guess...
den todae first thing i did was to freak over the aural thingy :S n play the pieces over n over n over again..+ the scales n ev.th... i wonder how i did for the sight reading? but its pretty easy tho..=/ well, 1 thing is 4 sure. i'm damn happi n glad tt everthing is over. but also at the same time worried abt the marks. i really dun wan to repeat manz.. guess its a 50:50. aniwae i juz can't wait to c my piano teacher tis sat =) ! at least we cud tok abt it..haha

wadever it is, i still feel tt todae is a fun dae. lol..coz its not da daily routine..ya noe? [but a nerve-wrecking one] Ok. guess this is it. gotta learn 4 dnt test tmr )= ..buaixx`

-=- Nobody's Home -=-

I couldn't tell you
Why she felt that way
She felt it everyday
I couldn't help her
I just watch her make
The same mistakes again

*What's wrong, what's wrong now
Too many, too many problems
Don't know where she belongs
Where she belongs *

She wants to go home
but nobody's home
That's where she lies broken inside
No place to go, no place to go
To dry her eyes broken inside

Open your eyes (open your eyes)
And look outside
Find the reason why (why)
You've been rejected (you've been rejected)
And now you can't find
What you left behind

Be strong, be strong now
Too many, too many problems
Don't know where she belongs
Where she belongs


Her feeling she hides
Her dream she can't find
She's losing her mind
She's fallen behind
She can't find her place
She's losing her faith
She's fallen from grace
She's all over the place

She's lost inside, lost inside (oh, oh uhh)
She's lost inside, lost inside (oh, oh uhh)

Yuppp~~~ i've changed back to da "original skin" tt i used to used..can managed properly le..whaharx i like this beta. =)

hmm..aniwae tis few daes. quite mani things happen. how shld i put it? Sch was boring as usual..I had nvr once looked forward to it. Juz can't wait to get out of da stupid sch gates everydae..N den i'm free. I duno y i detest sch so much. izit becos thrs nth to look forward animore? or the company? i dunoe..but sitting down for at least 8 hrs in sch a day ain't gonna help..

Sometimes i juz feel like a lost soul walking thru the crowds..I dunoe whr i'm supposed to be n whr i belong. N i feel stUpid. i dun act like myself. i'm like a different person inside n out. partly cos of my spilt personality? duh..i hope i wld revert to my self again.. i dun wan to feel so fake. aM i...?

Haiz..i tink todae is not a gd day for me to blog..can't really xpress myself well. But wadever it is, i noe i have to be strong to overcome everything tt comes my way. duh..but its making me unfeeling n numb. i know i'm bound to be sensitive to some things which i can't help it..n i can't stand it when ppl juz mis understood me. Do i have to explain everything to u?? well if u dun noe me , fine den leave it. bUt its not the same when its 1 of ur gd frens. i th0t u wld noe me betta den other ppl.. but i seemed to be wrong. it can be hurtful when the ppl who are close to each other dun actually understand themselves. then, may i ask..wad's the meaning of close? If tt's the case..den it wld simply be a meaningless union tts not mean to be.
I've learnt tt NOBODY understands u more den urself.. dey wun noe how u are feeling no matter how hard u try to explain.. u juz hav to experience it urself to noe how it feels. n i dun blame tt...but sumtimes i juz yearn for a soulmate who shared the same thots n feelings as me..Is that too much a thing to ask? haiz..but aniwae i tink tt thr are sum things which i juz couldn't open up to anione. i dunoe how to put it...but perhaps its juz because of my lost in trust in ppl even since i'm young...

I aM nOt wAd u tHot i aM. I don't feel obliqued to answer to anione N I certainly doesn't nid to pRovE tt to U.

Craap`
e pic is lost..haiz but also my fault la. i nvr saved..lol but now no time guess i gota do it nxt time ya? bear wif me...

yay~~ ytd was national day wor.. went out wif jiemin,jovi,jeslin,florence n kat to watch King Arthur. whoever thot the movie was boring..i dun noe.. But it seemed veh nice to me. at least still can understand bah..okay i noe i v.slow la now den watch..but schdays are juz damn busy n tiring..( hmm how mani times hav i said tt? ) aniwae i'm glad tt we hav this short holiday. kinda refreshing tho...but now i'm getting alil bit lazy to go to sch tmr..heh hehz. + anoda geog test rite? haixx` ---------------------------------

i guess this is all.. gd luck everone`

---> [ LoVe mAkeS e woRld go rOunD...] <---

tOdae is such a twist n turn for me...
firstly we had e cdan shoot..hmm scores huh haiya duno la. tink is forever like tt one. but aniwae its quite fun..we had buffett too but when its our turn the food are like 'gone' lo..onli left beehoon n fried rice..eat wad..=/ heh heh but nvm mr.cuthbert later treat us to pizza hut! =) so nice rite..tink i a few months nvr eat liao. but aniwae the trip back to sch is horrendous lor. tt tps n kel jus went crazi wif all those shots n i 'desperately' trying to dodge every opportunity. hiaxx` dunoe how mani photos dey got liao...N both of them die also dun wan to let me see..wad the. Stupid tps tot he was 'kind' but i was wrong..n tt kelvin tot he was suppose to be my 'sister' in the end also join force w/ tps...haizzzz`

Aniwae..lucky i nvr went off first n not join them for the lunch. Or i else i really regret arh!! my tuition teacher 'zi dong' come n sms me to change the date. muahahahrx` heng sia i nvr went home..or else i wld lose both in the end. but sianz la tmr in e morning still got tuition..nvm treat it as a revision 4 the test on fri? hmm....but i juz don feel like rotting at home sia. i wan to go out n play~~ yesh play... but these 2 wks are gonna be veh stressing for me...
God pls help me...

`*[ nvr tot things could unfold so unexpectedly..nvr understimate the thing called Fate]

]..+h3 uNcOnsCioUs...[

>> i dun feel like waiting animore..<<

Sigh..jus received msg tt thr is monthly shoot tmr.sianz..jus means tt i had to move my tuition back in e afternoon..YaWnz
`i tink i'm juz gonna waste my day away tmr`
tHere are just sooo mani tings to do. yet i'm still lazy enough not to accomplish ani. haizz..if onli none of that happened then..i wun be be it. wadever it is..
Let's see wad i've -. 3 ke biji, n tt english, n maths test, n piano exam, n lit test, n d&t test. Okay i noe all these ain't exactly goin to fall in the same week..but tts my overview for the nxt 2 wks. N 1 of tt is alreadi heaving my heart down. i just feel that i'm juggling too mani tings in my hand..i feel that i dun have the time to do my best in [everything] i had to` so what if i did well in one of it? the rest wld nagged/say/scold/whatever =S at me why i nvr did this` why i never did that` - look wad you've done-
One of it is a basic responsibility of a student [u shld noe wad it is],second is an co-curriculum, third IS ..a form of art.. i feel being pushed in all directions and having to accomplished everything at the same time. how can i do it? not to forget my social life..i'm tired everydae..i knew i wld jus collapse one day when i couldn't bear all this burden/responsibility on me animore. but i'm not weak, i will have to fight for it.
->School work is ever-stressing.I may be lucky this time round but not the 2nd. i knew i'm bad enough.i couldn't slip animore or it wld be gone case b4 i could step out of this sch.
-> i know results matter. i know we have to practice as much as possible.i knowe competitions are tough. i know my standard..but i have alreadi done my best. i did go for every single practice..but do these seemed enuf in their eyes? No.. what more could i do? i dunoe..and wheneva i c those accusation in the eyes i jus couldn't help it..
-> i admit its my fault. i din't did my best compare to the prev 2. in fact i felt guiltly..but since i've alreadi come this far..i wun giv up. haixx i feel that i words just could not explain how i feel..

is this wad i'm supposed to have? being demanded of every ounce of my energy to fuifill the things tt is wanted frm me. i knew partly its my responsbility but i know if this continues..n if one of them gets the better of me..i will have a breakdown soon.
but so what? nobody will understand (as i say again).. aniwae i felt better after typing everything out. If i can't complain to u..at least i could do that to my blog..'

* >> I am Never Good eNough for...<< *

Woo-hoo~ Sch rocks todae! {surprisingly} whaharx.. well one of da reason is tt todae is a half day and we had national day celebration =) well the morning wan was kinda boring tho. We had the free $1 coupon and the food is nice..but forget wads the name liao lol. Aniwae b4 recess it was Real boh liao~ nobody are playin games & thr is song dedication in the canteen..the songs are nice but the prob is tt the player seemed alil bit sot. The cd like keep jumping and dey are blasting real loud. Too loud also not so nice mah.. and I had nth to do at tt time. But luckily! Brought jay cd..hahaha den went to near the needle room there and we sing qi li xiang. So nicee but I tink mostly is I sing onli :S cos dey all keep sayin dey hvn hear gou yet. Lol I tink this song is easier to sing compared to the other songs..not so easily 2 be out of tune hahaha..

Newae the limelight of todae is the concert in the hall! We started wif the community singing but too bad our class nvr win.. den afta tt we had the winning teams of the upper sec which is the sec 4/4 n 4/5. their performance are soo gd compared to our lower sec and funnie..whaha the actions but in general dey are all very united. After that we began to go "wild"when we began to sing other songs everybody started running in circles round the hall wit e seniors..i joined in at da last round wif Cheryl dey all den we sang together shoulder to shoulder. I noe I being lame la but I reali enjoyed it! Its like so fun and being so close wif ur frens. The feeling is crazie and wild. Woo-hoo ~ if only it lasts longer..haixx but I guessed its not the end for ME. After we were dismissed tt Cheryl yoyoyo started pouring water at me ..n I was caught completely off guard manz. I mean I dun expect this..in the Hall! tink she too high until crazy..make me so wet n it did not end until I accidentally got rid of her water bottle ..whaha aniwae I really felt crazy todae n happy ..its been a looong time since I been happy in school [fun]

Be4 goin out wif da jie da we also went to the rang to vote for the captains bla bla. I tink its kinda lame tho..i mean so what if deir tally are low in the end? Its stil gonna be them to be the captains. No other choices le aniwae I hoppe tt the handover ceremony could be carried out smoothly sia. Dates have changed for da third time..

Haiya..typed until here I also alil bit sianz le..but canoot! Mus carry on cos storie hvn end yet..lol hmm we went to da shaw house to watch The village. I liked going to new cinemas..the feeling is totally different and at the same time could check out which is the best muahaharx. Aniwae the shaw house cinema is soooo damn big. Firstly their theatres are located all over the building got wad Prince n Jade de..bla bla and One theatre hav the size of the kallang theatre. No kidding its vehh big. But one thing which I find it pity tho is that the screen is kinda dim n small. Its also alil bit weird. I mean..doesnt it suppose to be the bigger the theatre the bigger the screen also?? I tink the screen is smaller den GV wan sia..but its a different feeling aniwae..so far I tink the best is the cineleisure & suntec de. =) ok back to da show..The Village..haixx y no ending wan..dotxx loh. I prefer endings..if not it will leave us guessing and its kinda watch= nvr watch for me..lol aiya I tink I'm not cut out for supernatural movies. Thriller yes. long time faves =p

Things are great for me until the movie ended..hmm we later walked to bugis frm shaw. Went to kinokuniya to check out some books first..( see le also canot buy *shake head) later went to Funan da IT Mall to book the studio for my practice..tink I quite long nvr went thr le den alil bit *blur*. Haix its getting funie for me sia took the wrong side for bus no.12 =x and instead of heading home I went all the way to outram!! And I still din't noe tt until I reached e interchange lol.. Okok I noe I'm publicly “humiliating” myself for being so stupid..Aniwae I took the MRT home later. [safer ya noe. At least I wun get lost..=] hahaharx..den my mom started smsing me if I going home not. dotx..aniwae I really thot tt I wun reach home until 8 todae. I was like oMg wad's this-.- haha but..Am I wrong. I had totally underestimate the speed of our dear mrt. It took onli half an hour to reached tampines frm Outram. Cool rite..
I think I had messed up the second part of my day and I almost feel sick due to the x-tremely warm afternoon sia. Haix aniwae I knew my entry is getting long oh wait..i mean its already Very Long lol but wadever it is.. I still have to congratulate u for having da patience n curiosity or boh liaoness to reach this part..mus hav been v.tiring huh? Okok I will stop crapping now.. Happy holidays ppl ~

---> [ i live for the moment] <---

>>OVer..OVer..OVer<<

Why isit like tt? ok i c how much i could recover my prev 2 posts which are yet to be published..grr

haiz forget it wil be back to this nxt time..or nvr...

--> things that are never meant to be <--

`~foreva~`

hEy~ haha..hvn been posting for a few days..lol. Hmm hav been surfing for sum new skins but stil can't find the ideal one tho. This is the best i had found =) todae arh..Ok loh juz tt afta P.E i felt veryyy tiring sia. tt soh is gona kill us 60 jumpin jacks?? as i said b4, i rather run..den jump -.- den durin the yue du ke i'm so bored tt i almos fell asleep.. aft tt had Ar training not tt tiring but energy consuming lol. hmm` i wonder if eka wil eva join ar?` and if she joined wad wld happen..but i knew tt it wld be tough on her..+ all the competitions among e gals. its not tt easy u noe..we also compete against ourselves de. & i tink it may take her a while to reach our so-called scores la..she may get disheartened or giving up.And ok..Ar isn't xactly the most FUN sports yea..its hot under tt CD shelter or ours. lame` aiya let all the talkin be wif Mr.Soh. i bet he wld tink of all the tings tt i listed above.

Tt weekly fund arh..~ haiz stil got sum 'gong' sec2s stil dunoe the meaning of Weekly sia. den dey all hav to wait for me to chase them den giv me $ wan..dotx hope tt in the 'near future' mos of them cud 'auto' giv me..haharx

Stuupid la..tmr got Geography )= tests wld be given back..i dun wan` i dun wan` i tink i wil die sia..surely not tt gd wan loh..Worst is fail. den mayb borderline pass onli..haixx doomed tmr sia. Dreading...den mayb we wil also hav make up claz cos last wk lost 4 periods? sianz stayin back in sch is so tiring n boring~ i juz can't wait to get out of the sch gates every day. & i dun tink i had any watsoever motivation for me to go sch anymore. sometimes i juz feel like screaming, all the tings tt are goin in my head. aLL e unfairness, biased, boring, tiring, irritating.
But i guess thrs sth tt i could call 'celebration' now : that i had goten rid of an irritaness, dun feel being watched, freedom, no nid to stand eir chit-chat animore. Ha! but i guess 1 may be starting soon...hOpe NoT. =)

---> a PerFect Life of iMpErFecTi0ns <---