ahhhhhhhhhhh!
after many fruitless searchings.. i guess i finally found a decent blogskin ?
but. kinda lazy to do it up now. hehe.
*
feelin kinda lazy now... its a coolin saturday afternoon!
=)
n coincidentally,,, a great day to be home. lol
ya. n since im gonna be homebound this wkend.. i will be flooding the post entries.
or manyb not.
haiz.. i dunoe how long i will be bloggin. sometimes its getting too personal to blog online, rite?
ive read it somewhr tt some regard bloggin as mass mailing . whr ppl jus read their frens blog to know wad dey r up to. a good place to be "in touch" wif ur frens. however, i feel tt it wld be better if dey wld jus tok to each other. rather den reading a lifeless entry via internet. its sad u noe. when everybody jus stop being contact wif each other. and i tink... im considered lousy in maintaining frenships. i wun tok to a fren which i hvn been in contact wif if he/she don strike up e conversation first... hmm. lik wondering if we are stil gd frens not? im sure everybody will have a grp of frens who falls into this category..

i don like to be tied down by responsibilites , an appointment, or just sth or someone. i value my freedom firmly. so much so tt i won noe if i will hurt somebody in e process. i lik spontaneity. i lik making decision right at e moment. i lik to be free.
but more often or not... life will nt be so gd on me.
like ppl will accomodate my luv for spontaneity. ha ha

i jus started readin Dan Brown angels & demons few days ago. manz.. wad a book. i happen to snoop in my sis room and chanced upon this book... n its e prequel to da vinci so i might as well read this first. haha. the book is full of history, scientific stuffs n physics made up a big part of it. thankfully.. my 6 mths of studies of phy n chem help me to understand part of it... lol.
n i realised the Illuminati is related to e american note. n some of e US presidents are mason...
provided tt e info in e book is true.
ive stil yet to research on e internet... but dan brown is one smart write. no doubt abt tt ;)

n meanwhile.. i will be back to e book, amaths n chemistry.

<------------>
Deleted my prev entry. cos now i just wan to be positive and bash out all the negativity.
but...
dey never fails to find me back..
arh whatever.
i look damn sucky in the class photo laa..
and somehow my smile turns out weird. as in... weeeirrd.
:(
seriously, thou not mani ppl agrees wif me. i tink i look different (when i smile) ever since i put e braces. and im very sure its the 4 missing teeths tt cause it cos the teeth do support ur face, ur cheekbone...n so on.
neh mind.
i tink im typin rubbish. jus tryin to defend my ugliness. HAHA.
stayed back in sch todae to finish up e zuo wen.
feels tt i wrote it in a v.slacky way n i seems to be repeatin my point over n over again. lol.
n all tt i tinks in my mind now is pian zi. cos literally, the whole compo is abt pian zi. haha.
geting abit lame now. oh well. its a FRIDAY!!
yeaaa. how i wish time cud stall now. i don like mondays can.
got my reasons for it
- got the Most` (heavy) books to carry for e day.
- e lesson combi is boring. 2 sciences, Hist, geog back to back. used to hate e 3 periods of maths but im Ohkay now. =)
- have hcl durin hw time. i used to tink its cool cos we can spend our time in a COOL room compared to e hot stuffy 02-03 bUt i don lik it cos chers OWAS teach sth when we are away and now mrs lim is givin us extra lesson durin hw time. lik wadddd sia. i don wan to miss it. y do they owas forget us huh? haiz
- oh.. n the last but not least. mon blues >.<

good reasons? ha. =X
i like maths now :)) mrs lim is such a nice gd maths teacher. im motivated to study maths cos for once i can finally understands! laaaaala. and she teach so fast its impossible to catch up if u miss her lesson. sighed.
e coming week hav quite a no. of test. so ... mus STUDY this wkend le. yes study. since i don have anith better to do. n i dun tink i wld be going out .... unless going out to study... which many don seems to be interested. hurhhh. neh mind... save $
i cant bliv it .. but i actually asve 10 bucks this week. whaha.
k. im geting crazy

i want to change my blogskin la. so sian of it liaoo...
iF only i noe how to make... sighhed. it wld be so gr8 . cos i jus noe exactly what i want.
hmm.
but wadever it is. i guessed im gonna change soon.

todae is ultimately boring. plain boring.
was very restless during maths lessons ...altho dell did nt come todae. 3 free periods! haaa
nt jus restless. i tink im abit depress. haizzz.
I just wanted the day to end man...
n i dun like geog in i-t room. tempted to fall asleep.
i can jus rant on n on of how bad n boring my day is
but now everything jus seems the same to me.
nothing changing - i m jus alil older each day
hmzz.. its not that i wan anith to change. im satisfied now.
i don want anith.
i jus don understand ...
hope flo can work things out . but afta e reason tt she says to me.. im totally behind her!
sad it may be. but somtimes i don think its worth holding on to. x)
tink im kinda out in e grp now. everybody seems to want the same things.. but no. i don feel it. i rather be the one dey come to and listens. haha
boring it can be ...
but hey! i still have a life.
a colourful life at that.

lalala. i like sunsets.

jus came home. x)
im drained... cant walk animore.
O. the bruise is smaller now. haha
hmm. woke up early in the morning. went for piano...
so relieved tt the worse is over now. but i hope i can make good wif the promise i did to myself.
kinda difficult. but i will try x)
afta tt went to do the flag sellin cip. haiiie no choice la.. my cip hrs is pathetic. and for wad i know.. i had to complete 100 hrs by next yr. lik wad the.
but me n jovita super super slack can. don tink thr wld be anibody as slack as us. whaha.
first thing we did was having breakfast at mac. den we chated alot n abt 2 hrs pass. we started doin the the flag selling for less than 30 mins. but had quite many donations k. Lol. den decided to go shopping.. went times to read magazine... den saw cheryl. den we acc them to lunch. afta tt min join us and we did 2nd round of selling... less than 30 mins also. n tadaaaaa! we finish it.
LOLX.
by tt time alr quite tired le...but we good pei jovi go heeren to buy present for her fren. haizz...den reach thr le discover tt there is no more stock. -.- afta tt shop for a while... went to a shop whr all the brands like rOxy, bilLaBong, RipCurl stuffs r there. everything!! tops, wallets, bags etc. and got so many nice ones ....... haiz. If only i have $ to spend
but now im really really broke =(

blahhhhz.
/-
if u asked me saving or earning better. i would choose earning cos' its faster and bigger sums den me saving abit day by day. plus the efforts tt i put in... i will feel more when i spend the money.
haa.

anwaes. gotta go for dinner wif my parents le (yay!)
lalala
byess`






+positivity

the bruise on my right knee is disgusting.
=X
the blood clot seems to get worse ...
so big n ugly
now is a big patch of purpish red!


arugghhh
PAIN!

ever thot how u wld feel if ur archive has been deleted away?
i cant. its nt jus a daily blog. it contains memories and feelings of the moment.
how precious.
sigheed.

Has been lookin thru my past entries. realising tt im nt much diff frm wad im now 3 mths ago.
n i agree tt days had passed v.quickly... but not emotionally. when u hav to cope wif ur feelings every single minute.
but im okay now.
i always loved thursdays.
n fridays.
(:

Unhappy






so many mixed feelings inside me now. i dunoe if its jus mood swings or wad... but it jus goes to me. i feel like restarting everything... i jus want to make things Right. for once. i dunoe where or when the hell i went wrong... but it jus gets to me so much so tt i cant stand myself anymore.
this is so messed up.
So messed up.

its nt tt i dont want to do. but sometimes im jus so tired tt i cant do my work animore..
and life dont jus revolve around one thing. thrs so mani things for u to be responsible for. to complete. jus becos u had to. i dunoe why X cant understand. responsibility!! don u even hav tt sense of it ? exactly things tt piss me off.
n i stil rmb exactly 1 year ago. this month. i was so stressed up manz. it was one of my breaking point.
And now. i jus want things for the better.
i want to be a better person.





wake me up..

hai`
ive got the feeling to blog now
but it will take forever..
yesterdae was a whole bundle of FUN!

go take a look at pengsoon blog
feel so touched. whaha
good friends. great bonds. arent we? ;)

dunoe how it feels like without u all nxt year ....


aniwae. was so pissed todae. i had enuf of cigarette burns this year. damn the smokers.
don care. no matter what it is. its stil your fault
do take ur piece of deadly poisons at a certain level
or best of all.
STOP SMOKIN IN PUBLIC u inconsiderate humans!

Today is the release date for Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. and as a fan of the series ( i read all previous five k) ....
im surprised i did nt go n snatch up lik everyone else this yr...
actually im dying to read it too.... but becos of Time Constraint ive decided against buying the book now. haiya.. seeing it lying at home will only itch me to read it. + e fact tt ive practically forgotten abt the OofP n CoS... readin it now is useless.
bleaah. and now i have to wait till e holidays to read it. but i can wait. haha
provided nobody spoil it for me.
i will kill the person who tell me the story.
lol

yestd was Racial Harmony day... the sch was so colourful...
but cant post pics yet... all of them r in jiemin camera.
hahaa.
had LC in the afternoon... okok la. but i wun say its easy...
and oso got exco meeting wif soh... overwhelmin us wif infos n stuffs. =X
my proj is due in sept... but liwei has to finish the speech by nxt week.. haa.
so las min.. but i guess nxt week will be quite bz wif ar stuffs. and probably the lasts of it.

supposingly to finish sum of my hw las nite.. but i ended up dozing. haiiiz.
k i guess gtg le..
i have an ultimate last-minute-thing to do wif the 2 or 3 of us...
eh.cant blame us. we kena influence by soh le...
LOL.
byeeee

crapp. im suppose to do my daily homework now. but
its been quite long since i updated and yea
school is as tiring as usual.
tink i shld realli try to replace the word tired to sth else.
i guess u guys are alr sick of tt word. LoL

it has come to an extent tt i wld jus forgo everything for my beauty sleep.
im so mentally tired tt i can jus fall asleep now. yes now.
and my legs ache like i jus went shopping for one whole day.
blahh.
aniwaes. i realli HATE. ss and hist class can???
especially that teacher.
wth. u noe how crazy it is? every periods of the week got test. quizzes. and she even wana use our ss period on fri for hist test. dAmn.
its like. whoaaa. so sian ..
todae jus finish 3 pieces of ws + essay of SS Test.
ha. and the most funny thing is tt i almost fall asleep while writing e esaay. almost is nt the word la. i tink i realli close my eyes.
LOL.
and friday leh.. got Essay Test AgAin. essay
must do the preparations again.
and its racial harmony day. got test?! grrr.
okok. i noe im complaining far too much.

on a happier note,
will be having the farwell dinner for sec4s at Hans' River.
haha. the restuarant is soh choose wan hor..
so we oso dunoe how nice it is. but hrd frm min.. seem nice.
hahaaa. its great to see everybody coming together. and the graduated seniors r coming too!
kinda look forward to it. but i hope nth goes wrong on tt day leh.
ok. nothing will go wrong. =)

the reason i onlined cos i wanted to blog...
i don feel the need to use da com so much as compared to last time le.
n im so happy.
can do so many things.
and of cos.. sleep early. lol






why why why`
is everday the same n exhasuting...

cos nth is changing.
nth will ever change.

im still awake and bloggin at this time.
haha

thOt i wld be tired frm goin out yestdae. but apparently not.
sighed. i cant slp la..

has been reflecting on wad ive been doing these months. these weeks. these days.
i knew i hvn been studying ...
the first week uses aR as an excuse...
and frm then.. my hw has never stop piling up..
and it just gets tiring and tiring day by day ... [as frm the posts below]
sufficient sleep keeps me awake ... but tiredness makes me feel real and busy in my life.
haha. a weird pov.
the new timetable realli sucks.
i realli hope that dey will change again... cos now dey have put all the subjects consecutively.
lik wth..
frm now on everyday mus do hw !
a bad thing. but a good thing too.
=X
im contradicting myself more n more..
but watever it is.
i better start studying later on..
i realli nid to.

x_x



i knew wad happen. i know. i know.

Alrite.. now left 2 mins to saturday. got so many things to blog abt..
firstly. Oral sux... totally screwed up. don wana tok abt it.
secondly, i finally found back my PHY file!!! im so relieved man.. has been searching for it for 3 days and tt classroom was my last resort. if it wasnt thr... i dunoe whr else. and my first reaction was super happy ... but afta tt i began to think. why hasnt anibody who used tt classroom pass my file to my class? fyi.. it had been thr for 1 week. if dey have been alil more helpful.. i would not have to go high and low for it and worry for 3 days. haiz.
but compared to flo and jewel... im considered lucky. their locker has been ransacked... and apparently, only their notes and files were stolen. and they were all science related subs.
the ppl who stole it are damn sadist... u want to learn u jolly well file ur own notes if not, put in effort to reprint it urself. NOT STEAL frm other ppl.. and if u think by taking their things u culd study well and get gd grades? sorry but NO. coz u hav taken the easy way out to settle ur own problems and not face up to it ... and in tt case. u can never succeed.
at first... i thought that was their motive. but after sch, flo told us that when dey went to check their lockers... it was wide open again. but thankfully.. dey hav transported their stuffs to kats locker so there is nth inside thr. by then, i feel that sth is realli wrong. since dey hav alreadi stolen all their notes and files, why bother to check their lockers if dere are other stuffs?

i feel that either somebody wana sabo them... or dey purposely want to harm them.

to think temasek hav such integrity-less ppl...



dey spoil the whole sch.

tired. tired. tired.


what more can i say ?


im having a headache now...
and it seems that everybody is so exhausted ...all thx to school.
damn la. nobody will understand the torture we're in.

haiz..` im so scared i will screw up the O's oral tmr...
what if i jus sit thr speechless ?
=X
blehh.

::
tmr's goin to be another tiring day .

I must really say that this entire week is SUPER TIRING!
realli lorh.
actauli was veri looking 4ward to this weekend so that i could sleep but ends up i did nth near to that.
- fri had chalet... -sat have to wake up damn early for piano lesson and todae woke up at 6:30 for the balloon day thingy.

the balloon thingy is not realli tt bad la. and the making of it was fun. got so addicted to twisting the flowers... lol. but ... the selling is kinda horrible la. and i got so tired of "asking" ppl for donation. keep getting rejected can be demoralising one loh. anw.. i also dunoe how we managed to sell everyth in the end oso.
but wad i wanted to say is ...
lets not tok abt students. we hvn earn money yet..
but some adults are realli guo fen lorh. esp the well to do ones. yes, dey earn their money by working but whr do their salary eventually comes from? the public rite. so is asking them to donate back to the society that difficult?
wth. i jus cant stand arrogant, stuck up, rude singaporeans.

after returning the cans at daughby gaut, went to Plaza Sing for dinner wif hh hl lf min n kat... lol. we chatted alot ... and when flo n cheryl came.. it was even funnier. haha. and everyone was so tired frm standing tt we sat thr for 2 hrs ... my feet is aching like hell.
n im so tired tt i almos feel asleep while waiting for my bus 21. LoL

btw.. i finally watched Initial D ytd liao! yay.
e movie is nice and funni. hahaha.
err. altho im a jay fan... i have to say tt his acting realli cannot make it la.
in fact.. i don tink he is acting lorh. the stony exp is so like him...
but. i wld stil ask u to watch. cos its nice!!
LOL.

aniwae.. i gotta end here. tonite must realli sleep early. im alreadi deprive of it for 6 nites.

nites`

Guess wad??

we had class gathering/chalet yesterdae ~~ !
im so glad i went...
cos at first i dint reali want to..
Only knew it during sch on friday... cos thurs nobody tells me much n i dint went for lessons too
and i was v.tired tt nite.. so when huihoon sms me i wasnt in the mood for chalet. hahaax
but luckily... i still went
thanks to evbody who keep asking me to go... LOL.
and sorry if u c my 'bu shuang' face... cos tt time i was acutalli unhappy wif someone. ( yea we r okay le. but nah..i dun realli put to heart cos it was owas an on-and-off case for us. lol)
the bbq is successful also... and i tink first time we finish all the food ba..
lol. and its the first time i ate chicken wings ever since i put my braces. so nice.. i wan to eat again..whahaa

den afta tt.. we just chatted and play for a while... cos i cant stay over again. =/
dunoe why but owas so qiao..whenever we hav chalet... i owas got sth on. haizz.
and its nice to see everybody again. even jen n eka went too... Lol.
i tink i reach home ard mid night ba...
and i fell asleep straightaway.
wadd a tiring week ....
but at least... it ended fun for me..

:)